The last week has been pretty difficult. I often struggle with feelings of being alone and left behind as everyone else seems to have their lives together while I am just existing. In those times it's easy for me to isolate myself which makes everything worse.
Thankfully a friend randomly text me and during our conversation, I ended up just writing some stuff I never expected but had I not done it, I'm not sure how long it would have taken me to figure it out.
Essentially, it came down to one thing, would I trust God to replace what I have now for something better he promised? In theory, I know God is faithful and kind but it's hard to trust him when you feel stuck in the same spot for over a decade. I want to trust God and yet I find myself holding on to the unhealthy things I have now with every fiber of my being because something is better than nothing.
Through it all, my friend made the point that God is a God of faith. Rarely will he forcibly take something from us; but ask us and give us opportunities to take a step of faith to follow him. Sometimes he will even take a step back to try and get us to follow.
It's not easy but my goal for the next few months is to reduce my grip on the things God wants me to give up and take the first of many steps to follow after him. If you're in a similar place, know you're not alone and don't feel like you have to do it all on your own. Find someone who can be the friend who gets you to start writing stuff you never expected to write.